We all talk for endless hours, spend our days together and have made it a way of life.
We call it a life.
But are making enough efforts to make the lives of those around us better?
I mean, yes, we’re existing together. We’re even making efforts to make the best out of life, but not fully.
We underestimate the role we play in others’ lives, barely recognize our potential and fail to make our presence count.
We take ourselves too seriously and get entangled in our own world.
Maybe we have become self-centered or maybe we have given others just a negligible role – but we’ve lost a regard for others’ existence.
In the part of giving ourselves more attention than necessary, we’ve missed a lot.
The one thing which I’ve learned through the years
We’re all craving.
There’s a part of you which craves for love, respect, attention, value and appreciation. It pleads to be treated like a human.
No matter how ordinary your emotions and desires seem, they make your life altogether.
There’s a child within you who cannot be fooled. He craves for what he deserves and tries hard to earn it.
You spend your whole life doing things which can earn you what you want; you don’t always get what you want.
You fail often and get disappointed by the lies, mockery, and betrayal of this world.
You believe that the world is a bad place, and soon you hide yourself within a coat of pretension, and calls yourself a “grown up.”
But soon, the coat of pretension falls off and reveals all your scars, pains, and hurts which you hide.
That’s when you can’t pretend.
All your emotions become naked and you realize how vulnerable and weak you are.
You realize that no matter how grown up you are, that child still stays within you. He never leaves you.
And finally you need to admit how human you are – feeble, weak, and just another living organism in the universe, hiding his innocence deep within.
A simple truth about life
I’m a grown up. Or at least my age indicates so. I’m often asked to be mature, behave in a particular way with people, learn some odd social etiquette, or just change my way of life.
I had to learn all this because I was taught to; even you were. Or maybe we taught it to ourselves.
Once you grow up you can’t cry, you pretend to be like everything’s alright even though something aches in your chest, and you smile without any reason to show how strong you are.
However, at the end of the day you’re left alone to deal with your own sorrows, and it feels miserable.
We’re craving for all the things we deserve in life.
We act fake in order to be accepted by others and lose our identities, we dress well in order to be liked, say the words we don’t agree with to please people, and what for?
Because we’re trying hard to be accepted.
Where it all started? I don’t know.
Maybe while we all were busy making lives harder for each other.
Is it necessary to be fake? No, I believe that you can always be loved when you’re genuine. There’s no need to become a hypocrite at the cost of your own values, identity, and principles.
The other truth
If you think that you’re someone out of the league and you won’t be respected, loved, or accepted by the society if you fail to abide by all its rules, then you’re like everyone else.
Here’s the funny part – everyone else is similar; insecure, fearful to judgment, and waiting to be accepted.
Let me explain it with a childhood incident of mine. It resembles this situation to me.
We had a dog in our society which was rather violent and barked at everyone. Everyone feared the dog; the dog ruled the streets.
Once, I suddenly encountered the dog from an unsafe proximity. The dog had come from some other street and stood right before me.
I turned pale.
I couldn’t think of any other rescue plan so I tried shooing the dog.
“Hurrr” I shouted.
The dog defended his side by barking. “Bow! Bhow!”
I stood there like a statue and didn’t move. “Hurrr!” I shouted again while hoping it won’t bite me.
The dog stood there firmly and at me barked again. I got stuck. There seemed no other way out.
So I jumped backwards, and ran for cover as fast as I could, praying in my heart to not get bitten.
I ran. I ran until I got exhausted and reached my home which was some distance away and turned back to see if the dog was still following me.
But what I saw then was funny.
The dog was running away even faster and had almost reached the other end of the street.
While I was thinking I was vulnerable, the poor dog was fearing me too. Overall, it was nothing more than an ambiguous situation.
It has nothing to do with dogs but something serious.
“We’re all making lives harder for each other, without even realizing it.”
No, we aren’t treating others like dogs and neither are others doing any such thing to us.
However, unknowingly, we’re creating an environment that prevents others from expressing how they feel and keeps them in their miserable state.
The regretful part is that same things are happening to us.
We fear others, others fear us.
We hate others, others hate us.
We criticize others, others criticize us.
And unfortunately this messed up list goes on.
The circumstances shouldn’t have been such and could be made better.
All this can be fixed if we take a stand and do what we’re capable of by making tiny efforts from our side.
If you play your part fair, the world definitely changes, no matter how slowly.
Don’t you notice this?
We drown so much in ourselves that we forget to admire the world that’s outside us.
Maybe we’ve become more selfish than we should be and have made this world a sorrowful place to live on.
Each day we think of our own happiness, our own dreams, and our own benefits.
But how often do we think about doing something for others? Yes, we do.
And do we do it? Not that often.
Just imagine a world where everyone’s trying to make others happy. Everyone caring about each other selflessly, spreading smiles, and doing well without any motive.
Wouldn’t it have been better?
That’s one of the greatest things I can imagine. It restores my hope and makes me believe that there’s still a lot of space for good.
This is what you must be worrying about
Although you can act like what others do to you doesn’t matter to you, that you’re a titanium who never feels pain, or that actions of other don’t bother you – they do.
You know how much they hurt.
But you’ve got so much used to it that you barely even notice how it affects you.
- The last time someone yelled at you.
- Told you something so painful that it’s hard to forget.
- Criticized you, judged you and made you feel ashamed about yourself.
- Insulted you by saying you how meaningless your thoughts are.
Couldn’t that have been avoided? Was it necessary?
We’re already wounded by such futility and often hurt by others.
The world consists of meaningless conflicts, buried hatred and petty thoughts – if you cut this part, it suddenly starts looking like a beautiful place to live on.
Everyone needs to be healed
Life would’ve been great if everyone worked for the welfare of others. Or at least, avoided adding anything to what’s already worsening.
While everyone is going through tough times, facing hardships, forcing a smile on his lips, and trying to find a meaning in his existence, you could be making a difference.
When it comes to happiness, don’t miss a chance to appreciate even the simplest of things in life.
I’m humbled when someone greets me with a smiling face.
I’m thankful to the people who appreciate my work which I put my heart and soul into.
I’m grateful for having everyone who cares about me and makes me realize my significance when I feel hopeless.
And tell you what? These simple things are enough for a lifetime to be spent happily.
Life’s made up of tiny truths, the sooner you realize them the thankfully you can spend the rest of your life.
And what would a good world look like?
Picture a place where everyone is making others happier with all that they’re capable of doing.
There isn’t much to it, and neither it is difficult to imagine.
The world we’ve been praying for will be peaceful and simple.
It will be the kind of place where:
- People won’t need to conceal their emotions when expressing themselves due to the fear of others.
- Dreams will be understood and shared instead of being kept suppressed due to vulnerabilities, judgments, or criticism.
- Everyone will back-up each other and help genuinely.
- There won’t be any ominous intentions for others but only transparent deeds.
- Words like hope, happiness, and ideas will be used more in conversations than talks about people.
The fact is, everything would have been a lot simple even if the people around us tried to be kind, generous, and loving.
You can’t keep waiting for that. Someone has to take a stand. You’ve got a responsibility – to makes lives well and to inspire.
Create a change as soon as you can. If others refuse to be a part of your dream, start with yourself. They shall follow later.
This is how influential you are (darn powerful!)
You underestimate yourself.
If you knew how influential your words and deeds are, you wouldn’t miss a chance to impact everyone around you with your presence, or to leave a mark of your deeds wherever you go.
Say your friend that he looks better with a white shirt on and I bet that he’ll wear it often. Isn’t it some sort of magic?
Tell an artist how much his art means to you and you’ll find him creating masterpieces. Isn’t it somewhat a miracle?
Convince your cousin that he could be doing better at academics, guide him well and he won’t disappoint you. Isn’t it astonishing?
Sit beside your loved ones, allow them to open up, and they’ll end up loving you even more. Isn’t it a blessing?
I’m in love with all this process of understanding others, giving them the freedom they deserve, and making little efforts to make them happy.
I would love doing it forever.
If I make myself seem excited while saying this then there’s a reason behind that.
I have a tiny secret to happiness which I wish everyone knew about, and maybe that’s the why I’ve written this post.
A tiny secret to happiness
I’m smiling while I’m writing this.
I’m telling you this because I wish you could know how it feels to see the gleaming eyes, cheerful faces, and open emotions on the faces of your loved ones because of the things you do for them.
It’s something I’m grateful and thankful for.
Some of the best moments in life are the ones in which you have some happy people around you and you’re the reason behind the sparkle on their faces.
This is the secret to happiness. To be more of those reasons.
You use your words, abilities, and gifts to make others smile, to give them the joys they deserve, and to create the change you had been waiting for.
And then, ultimately, you realize that you are born with a gift. The more you use your gift the better you become as a human.
It makes you capable of creating as well as cherishing happiness. In every moment, you learn to celebrate life.
And then you find out that this how wonderful this feeling is. The kind of feeling you would never wish to lose.
Once you realize this, you keep finding reasons to make others happy anyway, you stop caring about your own benefits, and surrender yourself to it.
It becomes a passion you cannot afford to lose by giving your life a meaning which you didn’t realize earlier.
Then, it becomes a habit.
Does this ideal of doing well to others and inspiring them excite you? Me too.
It fascinates me to see the way some genuine appreciation can make people smile. They always remember the way you make them feel! 🙂
— Vishal Ostwal (@vishalostwal9) February 22, 2016
Here’s a list 17 ways you can use to inspire others and add some sparkle to their lives.
1. Cheer them up
Tell others what they can become and then witness their enthusiasm shoot up.
People wish to learn about their capabilities. They need you to remind them of their strengths. They unconsciously search for an assurance that says “Yes! You can do what you think!”
When you fuel them with your words, they find themselves capable of doing miracles. And then they try to do so.
Your words can inspire people to tackle the impossible, confront their failures and take risks.
You doubt it?
Try cheering up others to find out the results for yourself. Maybe you’ll be surprised.
Here are some ideas:
- Remind people why they can be successful and mention their worthy qualities.
- Show them the brighter side of the things for which they take effort.
- Give them a purpose to work on by telling them why their work matters and what change it brings in the world.
This will be more than enough to fill them with optimism and get the adrenaline pumping through their nerves.
2. Give them hope
People don’t get what they deserve.
They fail often and feel like giving up. They become heartbroken. And then, they decide to quit.
They begin to think of themselves as losers when they’re not. No matter how hard they try, they just cannot see the brighter side of everything.
They deal with so many pains they become blindfolded to hope. It seems impossible for them to go on.
What can you do about this?
Keep their hope alive, kindle a spark within them, and don’t let them give up!
- Remind people of their past successes and show them how strong they are.
- Help them in solving their difficulties.
- Tell them why their ideas might bring out the unexpected wins.
Do whatever you can to make people hold on to their dreams. But don’t let them quit.
Be the light of hope whenever you can. Take a step toward rescuing people from their misery. If you don’t, you’ll be failing your gift of life.
3. Teach them
Are you great at something? Do you know something better than others?
You’ll be loved for doing that.
People are curious about knowing what they don’t know, and when you teach what they don’t know – you give them something to feel good about themselves.
Teach them a computer shortcut, a magic trick, a GK fact, rules of a game, how life works or anything that would leave a smile on their face.
As humans, we were born to grow by teaching and learning from each other.
We prosper only by educating others, creating awareness, and then creating an environment that accepts changes by understanding them.
Our feelings reflect what’s within us. Interests define us by showing what we wish to be. Experiences mold us and make us who we are.
When we use what we have learned for others – we make the world a better place to live on.
Be a nice teacher whenever you can.
4. Share your stories
People find solace in each others’ experiences.
They hear fairy tales, watch movies, and read books because they’re always searching something to which they can relate themselves.
Hope, despair, joys, pains, and all our emotions can be concealed and expressed through stories.
When the stories you talk about are your own – they’re worth sharing and capable of inspiring.
I’m sometimes a mere idiot who writes about incidents from his life. An ordinary conversationalist who shares random memories from his past.
But here’s what I know – people love listening to those stories. They wish to hear more of them.
You stories are your experiences. Each of your story is a mirror that reflects your life. Your stories speak truths on your behalf.
When you tell incidents from your life you allow other to peek into your soul, you show them a part of your heart that no one has ever seen, and give them a touch that lasts forever.
Be someone who shows his scars, vulnerabilities, struggles, celebrations, and opens up his life for lighting up the lives of everyone else around him.
Be a storyteller, you’ll end up living twice.
5. Help them
Be a ray of hope. Be the one to whom people look up to when they’re weak.
Your strength, talent and abilities that are capable of creating an influence.
Your wealth and resources are a means you can use to grow others.
In either ways, you’re always blessed with something that you can use to serve others.
Look around yourself. Things aren’t as good as they should be.
Broke families, hopeless relationships, insecure people, unhealthy individuals, painful lives – there’s something wrong.
You can fix that!
Help whenever you can. However you can.
Being trusted strengthens self-belief.
When was last time someone expressed his belief in you and stood by your side without doubting you?
It feels great, doesn’t it?
Even if for a second, you feel like you’re infallible, indomitable, and a winner for life.
Suddenly you reach your peak state, try harder, stop doubting yourself, and form a mind-set that shows no trace of fear.
That’s how others feel too when you trust them.
The world if full of people filled with fear and doubts, and all they need is some people to trust them.
Maybe a slight push to step out of their limitations and face the odds. You can be the one to make that push.
Trust those who tell you their ideas, trust those who share their dreams with you, trust those who come to you when they need nothing more than a friend to talk to.
That trust is magical, it’s capable of making people do marvels, and it costs nothing.
Can you recall those messages your beloved ones sent you on your birthday?
You probably know what I’m talking about. How special it feels. The love and care you receive from others – It’s a blessing.
We all wish to feel special and to be cared for – all of us! There are no exceptions.
Take some time out to ask people if they’re alright. Show them you affection for them by expressing it with your words and actions.
They’ll be touched at their heart by knowing that you care to remember them and show them how much they mean to you.
Make others feel important. Show them how special they are. Care for them.
8. Take a stand for them
Stand for others when they’re vulnerable.
When they’re weak, when they see no hope, when they’re broken, when they’re damned, they need someone to be there with them.
We all are such – weak. None of us is capable of fighting all the struggles or standing the adversities alone.
We need some saviors and rescuers when we fall or fail.
I still remember when a senior boy tried bullying me in school. I had turned pale and fearful.
The boy approached to hit me but an elder friend of mine came to my rescue. He grabbed that boy, smacked him on the shoulder and pushed him aside.
“You got a problem?” he said threatening him.
The boy tried saying something but couldn’t and began stuttering.
“Shut up!” my friend interrupted and warned him to not mess up again. That boy silently vanished from there with a lowered head. He had to.
“Never fear such morons. The more you fear, the more they bother you,” my friend said.
I can still recall that scene. It’s fresh inside me. I was relieved at that particular moment.
What I don’t remember is the exact reason behind that conflict.
I guess it was because my bicycle had mistakenly bumped into his bicycle while I was walking getting it out of the parking area.
But what I remember more than those things is what my friend did for me.
He was there for me when I was weak.
He took a stand for me.
Taking a stand for someone else is like being a superhero. It’s about using your powers at the right time.
Be a superhero maybe. Take a stand for others.
9. Respect them
Respect is something everyone is working really hard for.
All are hell-bent on earning respect.
They work till late nights to earn more money, buy expensive things and show-off to display a higher status, or simply wish to do something which would get them others’ attention.
They cannot be blamed for it either, as respect is something that motivates us. It’s a part of our existence. If we’re doing something to achieve it there’s nothing much wrong with it.
But what if you’re respected for the way you are and where you are? That would obviously be great.
You can give people what they’re working for – respect.
It takes nothing to be gentle in your interactions with people, doing little things for them or to treating them better.
But the impression it leaves on their mind is powerful. They feel good about themselves. And then, they thank you for making them feel so.
Finally, they respect you in return and treat you back equally.
10. Be kind
Greet people with a smile, forgive their mistakes, and treat them like they mean something.
Being kind is about doing the little things that count and developing a mind-set that only wishes to do well.
It doesn’t require any kind of training or practice but a slight change of thoughts and intentions.
Honestly wish for the growth and success of everyone. Don’t wish for ill against anyone and be tolerant with people.
Kindness is about being more humble and easy on people.
11. Understand them
If you don’t understand people, you leave them to suffer in pain.
Often, people are silently suffering in isolation and ask for nothing more than being understood. They’re dying inside, wishing for someone to feel how they feel and condole them.
If you don’t allow others to express how they feel and don’t listen when they speak their heart out, why would they be with you?
Be someone whom people rely on for lessening the burdens of their hearts.
Walk into their shoes to know how they feel and make them feel valued. That would be enough sometimes.
12. Appreciate them
It gives people the hope of going on, it reminds them of their goodness and increases their self-esteem.
Appreciation starts with mentioning the good.
You often see something wonderful and admire it, but do you always care to mention it?
The next time you see you friend dressed well, tell him that he looks nice.
If your cousin plays great guitar, tell him how wonderful it sounds.
If you have some people who fill your life with happiness, appreciate their presence and tell them what they mean to you.
Everything that’s good in this world needs some appreciation to happen and to realize its value.
If you don’t appreciate good things, they perish. If you don’t appreciate good people, they fail to realize their value.
You don’t want that to happen.
The next time you find something adorable, don’t forget to mention its loveliness.
13. Don’t judge them
Judging is a low form of expressing your opinion and implying your own thoughts against someone else.
When you judge people, they don’t change their opinions but they do conceal their emotions and beliefs. Sometimes, they even hate you.
People, when judged, feel devalued.
They become fearful while expressing, hide their opinions, think of themselves to be idiots, and they don’t forgive you for pushing them in that miserable state.
It’s not that they change themselves because of you. But they’ll shun you for judging them.
Soon, they won’t even care how you feel about something or what your views are, and maybe, even avoid being with you.
It’s not your job to decide what choices others should have or what their views must be like. Allow them to be themselves.
Yes you might disagree sometimes, but there are other ways to changing people without being unkind.
There are already enough of people making others’ lives miserable, and there’s no need for some more.
Allow others to be free, let everything just be.
14. Criticize less
You might think that you’re being quite rightful while pointing out the wrong, but it only makes others shun you.
Insulting others, is like slapping them on the face. By doing it you lower them to others, and strip down their reputation.
Also, it doesn’t even serve to any purpose most of the time.
Criticism is one of those obstacles which most people face on their path to success. It drags them down and shatters their beliefs.
It’s not always the right way to make people aware of their mistakes.
You can be softer in your approach, convey your concerns humbly, and tell how things could be made better instead of telling how unsound they are.
Tell them what’s right and leave the rest up to them.
Allow them to learn their own lessons, let them make some mistakes, but hold the urge of criticizing them. It may break them.
15. Thank them
Thank you – this word brings out the good in others.
Saying thanks in response to the good things done to you assures others that their deeds do count.
This shows them that their kindness is being noticed, that their tiny acts are really adding happiness to others’ lives and bringing a change.
People need to know that whatever good they do is valuable, and even if they don’t always ask for praises or appreciation, they do feel a need for it deep in their hearts.
But don’t be mistaken to think that people do well so that others may be thankful to them. Not at all. They play their part anyway.
But it’s your role to preserve that kindness by showing how essential it is for the good to prosper and prevail.
16. Be genuine and truthful to them
When you’re betrayed, you feel insecure among our own people.
The lies and secrets which you bury deep within your heart only breed distrust and insecurity.
If you wish to genuinely wish to be part of people’s lives then you have to be honest. There hasn’t ever been anything else that matters as much honesty in relationships.
When you fool others to fulfill your motives, whatever you get is undeserved.
Don’t fake yourself to others. People expect you to be what you are. Always.
17. Be there for them
You can’t be with everyone all the time.
But you can ensure them that they can rely on you, which works in the same way as your being with them.
Establish a belief in the heart of people. Make them feel that you’ll be there for them whenever they’ll need you and abide by your word.
Your presence is rather comforting and soothing to others.
This will allow those around you to live more happily and freely, as they’ll know that they’ve got a backup just in case they fail.
They’ll know that they have someone by their side, whatever be then.
One gift you shall have – you will be remembered
While you’ll engage yourself in doing all the virtues and contribute your own tiny bits to the world, you will also receive back what you give to others.
You shall what you’ve been waiting for, what you deserve, and what makes life beautiful. You will have it all.
Your world shall be a peaceful one, and your people – happy.
In the end, you will be remembered for every deed that you do for others and your efforts will pay off in the long run by turning you into a humble human.
These good deeds of yours won’t go unrewarded.
You’re born with an enchanting ability of inspiring others. You can add more smiles to the lives of people around you.
And most of the time, it takes nothing more than a bit of generosity and kindness to turn the world into something better.
What do you think is the best way to inspire others? Wish to share something? Feel free to leave a comment.